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Welcome to my blog: Today's Lady Virtue. This site is for women--wives, mothers, singles, widows, family, friends, etc.! My heart is to share loving encouragement coupled with timeless truths from God's Word, the Bible, to enlighten, uplift, and empower women of today. At Today's Lady Virtue we're about "Reclaiming Virtuous Womanhood today the Time-tested Way!" Here you will find a variety of posts from poems, to "Put into Practice" principles, to pictures and more! I invite you to voyage with me on the quest to become Today's Lady Virtue.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

The H's of a FruitLESS and FruitFULL Marriage


Reminder: These ABC's of a FruitLESS or FruitFULL marriage are intended to be fun and though-provoking not "gospel" or absolute.  I think they are useful for providing visible contrasts in our behavior and can help spotlight areas that we are doing well in (or need improvement in) our marriages.

H is for HIGH-HORSING     the pompous action of perceiving oneself to be better than thy spouse and lording a matter over them for the purpose of self-exaltation

H is for HUGGING     embracing; the action of wrapping one’s loving arms around one’s spouse and squeezing tightly

H is for High-horsing, hugging, and HAPPY VALENTINE's DAY!!!  :)  

Sometimes synonyms help us understand word meanings better.  Here are some synonyms for "  High-horsing"...

beating a dead horse
(NOT) budging
NOT wrong
lording it over
keeping (and listing) a record of wrongs...
It is MY WAY or the HIGHWAY!!!

Hit the road, Jack, and don't ya come back no more, 
no more, no more, no more!

Yep.  When we choose to mount that High Horse...well, it pretty much makes our hubbies want to make like a plane and jet off.  We sort of run them off in a way as they don't take to kindly to being put down because we're so puffed up that we can back off.

One of the absolute worst places to "high horse" our husbands is in public.  We totally disrespect them when we are in a public setting and we insist on INSISTING ON our way.  Whether we "high horse" them in the presence of their friends, our friends, family members, neighbors, or even strangers--they feel totally disrespected.

A very close second to publicly "high horsing" our men is in front of our children.  We tear down our children's fathers when we "high horse" them in front of the kids.  We should be modeling how to HONOR their father, not break him down and shatter his leadership.   
NOTE: I am not saying that we should never question our husbands--rather I am promoting that we wisely and tactfully discuss our concerns with them in private so as not to destruct them in the presence of the children.  See "Pray it Don't Say it" principle for more application.  Remember, manners and motives matter!
When we mount this horsey, we're really just riding on our prIde.  Here is some proverbial wisdom from God's word on this subject:   

 17 "The highway of the upright avoids evil;
       he who guards his way guards his life.
 18 prIde goes before destruction,
       a haughty spirit before a fall.
 19 Better to be lowly in spirit and among the oppressed
       than to share plunder with the proud." Proverbs 16:17-19

 What can soften the situation here?  Things are getting tense...How about a little apology (I'm sorry.) and a BIG HUG???  

To HUGor High-horse, the question remains,
Which one of these will cause lesser pains?
To choose or not to let my prIde flare,
To choose or not to even go there...

Manners and motives--do they really matter?
Would it be wise to hose 'em with chatter?
Would I or could I let it off, shrug
And humble myself to give 'em a HUG?
If faith, hope, and love--these three remain,
Then choose the choice without the pain!
Dismount high horse that's full of prIde ,
HUG'em instead, the rest will subside!

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