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Welcome to my blog: Today's Lady Virtue. This site is for women--wives, mothers, singles, widows, family, friends, etc.! My heart is to share loving encouragement coupled with timeless truths from God's Word, the Bible, to enlighten, uplift, and empower women of today. At Today's Lady Virtue we're about "Reclaiming Virtuous Womanhood today the Time-tested Way!" Here you will find a variety of posts from poems, to "Put into Practice" principles, to pictures and more! I invite you to voyage with me on the quest to become Today's Lady Virtue.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

The J's of a FruitLESS and FruitFULL Marriage


Reminder: These ABC's of a FruitLESS or FruitFULL marriage are intended to be fun and though-provoking not "gospel" or absolute.  I think they are useful for providing visible contrasts in our behavior and can help spotlight areas that we are doing well in (or need improvement in) our marriages.

J is for JEERING     poking fun at, joking coarsely with, or mocking one’s spouse; synonyms: annoying, nuisance, pest

J is for JAVA-ing     low key yet intimate dates with one’s spouse involving the consumption of coffee and sometimes chocolate

Speech! Speech!

A good friend of mine once compared our speech to a tube of toothpaste.  The toothpaste in the tube is like the thoughts, feelings, and WORDS that are stored up inside us.  The cap is like the door of our lips.  Likewise, just as we can squirt out toothpaste, so we can squirt out words.  Moreover, just as we cannot squeeze back that oozing toothpaste inside the contents of the tube of toothpaste, so we cannot squeeze back the words we spewed out inside our mouths.  I can picture that, can you?

Jeering at our spouses is like that toothpaste.  My good friend Merriam-Webster gives the following definition of jeering: 

Main Entry: 1jeer
Pronunciation: \ˈjir\
Function: verb
Etymology: origin unknown
Date: 1561
intransitive verb : to speak or cry out with derision or mockery transitive verb : to deride with jeers : taunt
synonyms see scoff
jeer·er noun
jeer·ing·ly \-iŋ-lē\ adverb

Words sicken, but The Word took up our infirmities.
Words sadden, but The Word carried our sorrows.
Words pierce, but The Word was pierced for our transgressions (sin).
Words crush our spirits, but The Word was crushed for our iniquities (sin).
Words wound, but by the wounds of The Word we are healed.
Forgive and you will be forgiven.

Isaiah 53:4-6 (New International Version)

 4 Surely he took up our infirmities
       and carried our sorrows,
       yet we considered him stricken by God,
       smitten by him, and afflicted.
 5 But he was pierced for our transgressions,
       he was crushed for our iniquities;
       the punishment that brought us peace was upon him,
       and by his wounds we are healed.
 6 We all, like sheep, have gone astray,
       each of us has turned to his own way;
       and the LORD has laid on him
       the iniquity of us all.

Consider how Jesus handled the unjust jeering that was hurled at Him on the cross.  We are to be IMITATORS of Christ.  Power up, girls!

23"When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. 24He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed. 25For you were like sheep going astray, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls." 1 Peter 2:23-25

Instead of jeering our husbands, why not try JAVA-ing with them instead?  

J is for JAVA-ing     low key yet intimate dates with one’s spouse involving the consumption of coffee and sometimes chocolate
Chances are, if we find ourselves jeering our husbands, what we're probably looking for is a little time to connect!  Why go that back-handed way of poking, pestering, annoying, mocking, and being a nuisance to?  Why not brew 'em up a nice cup of coffee (and maybe even dose him up with a bit of chocolate) and have a conversation?  Sometimes no conversation is needed at all...just a little shoulder-to-shoulder with a warm something in your hands will do.  

Try it and see!


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